When a beautiful thing – often an object – crosses my line of sight, I have increasingly, tried to stop and understand why I perceive it as beautiful. I often find these things so beautiful, I have an overwhelming need to get as close to this beauty as possible.

If you looked up examples of different types of synesthesia, this feeling comes closest to mirror-touch – a synesthetic experience where individuals feel tactile sensations on their own body when they see someone else is being touched.

Like a moth, I try to flock to it, this thing of beauty. This is sometimes problematic, because more often than not, the object is very far away. Generally, it involves light, how light touches an inanimate object, for example, the edge jutting out of a building at 50 meters of height, or the sharp edges of a reef.

Except, here, the sensation is almost akin to jealousy or envy. Envy towards the building or reef for receiving light. The envy is overwhelming, and all I can think of is enveloping this thing, morphing into it (like a mattress through one you can breathe), and being it, so as to, maybe, absorb as much of that as possible.

Vitamin D deficiency is nothing extraordinary, and there’s nothing extraordinary about seeking warmth either. I suppose I’m just seeking it in places that aren’t inherently ergonomic.

Synesthesia is still a work in progress.